From the Rabbi - June/July 2003

"Rabbi," said the voice on the other end of the receiver, "this is Chaplain Smith from St. Joe's. We have a patient here in the ICU who is dying and who wants to see a rabbi. He's not affiliated with any congregation, but his family has requested that you come down to see him…."

Dear Friends,

I receive a call like this at least twice a month. While I try to accommodate the family's needs as best I can, more often than not, I can't help them. The Board of Trustees has requested that, except in the case of a tragedy or emergency, Cantor Shuchat-Marx and I refrain from performing life-cycle events or hospital visitations for non-members. I understand and support their request. As the only clergy for a 675+ household congregation, our time is limited and we need to be available to you, our members, before reaching out to the unaffiliated. I'm always saddened when I have to tell a grieving family that, while I would like to help them, I simply can't. Oftentimes this engenders anger and feelings of rejection on the part of those who ask for help and are refused. The middle of a crisis is not the time to tell these grieving family members that it is not the Jewish Community who has rejected them, but it was their choice not to affiliate.

There are many reasons not to affiliate with a congregation. Most, in my opinion, do not make any sense. Many of us have heard from our non-affiliated friends that "it costs too much to join a synagogue." This is simply not true. As far as I know, every congregation in our community has a flexible dues policy that will accommodate everyone regardless of ability to pay. Others say that they don't need the synagogue anymore: their kids have grown, they were members of a congregation "back East" (or West). Everyone needs the Synagogue. As Jews, we live by the principle: Kol Yisrael aravim zeh ba-zeh - All Jews are responsible for one another. Even if you, personally, do not "use" there are those who do - and who could benefit from your support. The Synagogue is not a "fee for service" organization. We exist in order to ensure that Jews can have a spiritual home, study Torah and share simchas and sorrow together.

Still others have resigned out of anger or hurt. Whether intentional or unintentional, we did not meet their needs. We snubbed them. We caused them pain. And so they left. These are the hardest of all for me. I'd like to believe that all of us - especially me - were sensitive and caring at all times. In situations like these it is my fervent hope and prayer that if Congregation Albert cannot be their spiritual home, they may find another congregation somewhere else.

If you know of anyone who has left the Temple, or who has decided not to affiliate, encourage them to reconsider - I would love to talk to them over the summer and explore the possibility of reconnecting with the Jewish Community.

B'shalom,
Rabbi Joseph R. Black

Previous Bulletin Page
June/July 2003 Bulletin Home Page
Next Bulletin Page